“So, are you ever going to blog again?”

“I know, I know. I’ve just been fucking manically doing things for the last couple of weeks, you know? Two weeks, three states, and about four hundred blog posts worth of bizarre adventures. I mean, that twat in the hat would make five on his own.”

“The twat?”

“In the hat. You see – exactly my point. It’s bad enough that I had to be on my best behaviour that night, but not to have blogged about it the next day… I’m a bad, bad blogger.”

“Why don’t you just declare blog bankruptcy?”

“Ha. Like email bankruptcy? Just wipe the backlog clean and start again from now?”

“Sure. Why not. Save some adventures for the next book.”

“That’s not a bad idea. People will be pissed off though. They’ll say it’s because I can’t be arsed to write the four hundred blog posts.”

“And they’d be right. But they’ll also have to buy the next book to find out what the hell you’ve been doing for the last two weeks.”

“That’s a good point.”

“Thanks. Hey, is that a new laptop?”

“Bite me.”