“The easiest thing to do on earth is not write”

– William Goldman

In ten days’ time, this blog will celebrate its first birthday. A cake will be baked, streamers will be unfurled and all assembled will sing a little birthday song.

And then will come the customary ‘looking back’. How much has changed in the previous twelve months, how much older things are looking, how much we’ve learned. And then some idiot will trip over the buffet table and all of the sausage rolls will be ruined.

To prepare for the party, I’ve decided to have a bit of a spring clean of the blog. Change of colour scheme, updated the text a bit to make it clear it’s a personal blog, that kind of thing. I’m also making yet another public resolution to write stuff here more frequently.

Difference this time is that I might actually stick to it.

You see, the last time I managed to update daily was when we were writing the Second Life book. Weirdly, the more words I have to churn out for work, the more inspired I am to blog. And vice-versa. I think it’s a rising tide lifting all ships thing. Or work displacement. Or something.

Either way, I hope to God it works. The deadline for the Alienating Tail (not actual title) book is hurtling towards me and I still have a shit load to write. There’s too much to go in, and too many years of stuff to go back and revisit (tautology is a great way to churn through the word count, by the way) for it to be easy. But I’ll get there. I usually do with things like this. Inshallah.

Mindful of the above, I really need to turn down any other writing commitments until at least January. Which is obviously why, at dinner last night, I was asked if I’d be interested in having a crack at writing a TV script. And it’s why I nearly bit the hand off the person asking. I’m an idiot. But given who was asking (and the fact that she was buying dinner) I’d have been even more of an idiot to say no.

The fact that a) I have no real idea what a script even looks like, except what I’ve seen in William Goldman books b) I’ve never written a word of fiction before and c) I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN A WORD OF FICTION BEFORE didn’t seem to alarm anyone, which I fear has lulled me into a false sense of capability.

Fortunately, on hearing my panic, my friend Ruth, who has actually written a screenplay, sent me the following magic formula…

‘one page = one minute’

…which is brilliant in its simplicity. Armed with that, the rest will surely fall into place.

You know what, it’s going to be an interesting couple of months. I’m really quite excited which, given how the rest of my life is going at the moment, is something of a surprise.

No, not excited. That other thing.

Terrified.